A Really Raunchy “Fuck You” To Hollywood

Last night was the ceremony for the second annual Streamy Awards, which, for all of you non-geeks out there, is an award show for web shows. Think about it like an Emmys for the internet (and if you don’t know what the Emmys are, well, geez, we can’t help you). We’re not in web video, but we sent out our editrix (who’s a renown geekarizer and fancies herself a member of Los Angeles’ tech set, the poor thing) to feel out the event and come back with some juicy gossip.

She didn’t. Nevertheless, the L.A. web cognoscenti are on fire in various social networks today in regard to the award show.

Apparently, while our editrix was enjoying a tryst in the ladies’ lavatory — the award show was collapsing into a festival of vulgarity.

Here’s what everyone is upset about:

Lisa Nova and Chris Hardwick were molested onstage by other members of the webvid glitterati:

Streamy-veteran Felicia Day was accosted by David Faustino in nothing but his underwear while retrieving her award. Screengrab below from Web Series Today, via NewTeeVee:

When technical difficulties ensued, two men ran through the crowd naked, stopping only to high-five Kevin Pereira, host of G4’s Attack of the Show. They remain unidentified. Screengrab from @Kiddsock:

According to Garrett Garese, founder of Spytap Industries, the ceremony also involved a fake porn producer receiving “a ‘lifetime achievement award’ and repeatedly uttering variations on the phrase ‘oceans of semen.'”

Mathieas at Web Series Today makes mention of more of the shenanigans, including “numerous masturbation jokes” during the opening as well as a “five minute bit about vaginal reconstruction.”

Many in the industry are issuing apologies to their viewers today, for asking them to tune in to the event on Ustream. We like director Blake Calhoun’s take on the whole thing: “I liken this misstep to Kevin Smith’s early movie career. He made Clerks. Was a big hit. Went out and made Mallrats next. Was a huge flop. But then he made Chasing Amy… Let’s hope next year’s Streamy Awards is our Chasing Amy (without all the dick jokes of course).”

We’re into those dick-jokes, of course, and hope the event won’t be entirely sanitized. But there’s a place and time and proper method of execution for everything, creatures. Don’t ever forget that.

Anyway, here’s Hollywood saying “fuck you” right back: “Technical difficulties plagued the second annual Streamy Awards on Sunday night, somewhat fitting for a ceremony that honors web series.” And so the web’s battle to be taken seriously marches on.

PS: we’re kidding about the tryst. Our editrix was charging her iPhone. Hey, have a laugh, we all survived the Streamys and a little glitch is not going to stop the web’s content creators from doing what they do best: keep on rocking.

Photo of Orpheum Theater in the banner montage by Billy Jensen. Screengrabs and videos are linked to their source within the post.