You’ve got an issue overflowing with pieces about the 101 best eats around the world. How do you make the cover pop? A totally irrelevant image of a woman practically blowing an asparagus spear, that’s how! If Newsweek‘s editor Tina Brown hoped the image would inspire an avalanche of conversation online to drive meatspace sales, she didn’t take into account how pervasive this form of trolling has become.

Every year, the LA Weekly releases a sex issue. This year, their masterpiece about sex in Los Angeles is in the style of Chuck Palahniuk — if you gave him a tranquilizer and forced him to remain PG-13. We’re not sure if we’re thrilled or depressed.

Carl Zimmer, a celebrated science writer, has published a piece about Neil deGrasse in the January issue of Playboy magazine. Almost immediately after the article started making the rounds on the internet, the question of whether “respectable authors” should publish in magazines like Playboy arose.

Apparently, Cosmo has added a new sex position to their catalog and they’re looking for help in naming it. Curious, we headed over and scoped it out only to find the position wasn’t so new after all.

When Los Angeles’ adult industry was rocked by a positive HIV-test result in October, the media wasted no time in condemning the industry. The LA Weekly’s Informer blog suggested AIM was refusing to report the HIV case to government officials, citing a need for a more comprehensive test to be performed, which the reporter called “bullshitty.” It’s a very firm position to take.

The magazine is not about sex work, though on occasion the topic does grace its pages (“The Style of Venetian Courtesans,” anyone?). Why the name? It was inspired by a quote from suffragette Tennessee Claflin: “We have tried to make ‘rake’ as disgraceful as ‘whore.’ We cannot do it. And now we are determined to take the disgrace out of whore.”

The LA Weekly tackled the sex industry this week with an epic headliner about brothels. The piece, which explores the influx of women from all over this recession-stricken country to legal brothels in Nevada, centers around the stories of a handful of girls with mouths to feed.

Cosmo and Maxim are pretty much all about guys. Of course, Maxim doesn’t fill its cover with ways to make men better. It announces how to make money while doing nothing and how to use one’s phone as an espionage device. Cool! Meanwhile Cosmo can’t even talk about female genitalia properly. Va-jay-jay, really?

Ah, welcome to the future of porn! Presenting… 3-D glasses? Really? Yes. This Friday, Playboy magazine will include a set of 3-D glasses. (Scroll down for a NSFW pic!) “What would people most like to see in 3-D?” asked Playboy‘s inimitable Hugh Hefner. “Probably a naked lady.” Hef’s pretty real about this gimmick. The publication’s…continue reading.

Lynsey G. writes for porn rags. She didn’t plan it, just kind of fell into it. Since last year, she’s been writing a column at McSweeny’s about her conflicted experience as a woman and feminist in the madness of one of the biggest industries in the world. This, dear readers of Sex and the 405,…continue reading.