Melt My Heart With Gore

Whether you’re in love or in lust, the movie experience can be treacherous. The idea of forcing someone to sit through a movie beside me when they clearly had no interest–or worse, having to suffer something like Meet The Fockers or The 40 Year Old Virgin–gave me so much angina that when I was married, my ex-husband and I pretty much only shared the car ride to the movie theater, then met after our movies were finished.

(In sickness and in health, in escrow and foreclosure, but hell no, I am not watching another stupid comedy and screw you for not thinking Sin City was rad, falling asleep during 300, and calling La Dolce Vita one of my “little French movies.”)

Of course, just in time to commemorate the finalization of my divorce, there has appeared a movie on the horizon that requires little compromise.

Introducing: Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, a flick based on the tweaked Jane Austen classic (courtesy of by Seth Grahame-Smith) that infuses the storyline with a nasty zombie invasion.

Due out in 20011, this flick’s odd enough to interest most people, sweet enough to inspire the romantics, and creepy enough to bring out the lovers of ghouls.

Oh, and did I mention Natalie Portman is playing Elizabeth Bennett? If seeing her royal cuteness fighting, all covered in gore isn’t reason enough, I don’t know what is.

Stay tuned for Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters. You think I’m kidding, don’t you?

Image from the cover of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies by Jane Austen and Seth Grahame-Smith, from Quirk Books. Information from CNN.