USC is Apparently Sluttier than UCLA

Take this with a grain of salt, since the LA Weekly didn’t really bother telling us anything about their methodology. Here’s what we know. Last year, they asked an undefined number of UCLA students a bunch of questions which may or may not hold any significance. A year later, they asked USC students the same questions. Not the best methods by a long shot, but you can send them your angry letter about it later. Here’s what they concluded: “It’s a good thing that USC picked a world-famous condom magnate as its school mascot.”

USC doesn’t blink at the idea of getting down after boozing up, possibly with more than one person. But throw some economics into the mix and suddenly, it’s harder to get down with these kids than anyone on the Erotic Review.

“Assume you’re a virgin and you’ve decided to sell your virginity. What, realistically, would be your asking price?” Female students at UCLA last year listed their price at one million. For USC girls, it was ten million. Guys were glad to give it up for a grand — still higher than the average male commands for a night. Sorry, guys.

Best answer: “$7,895.63, adjusted for inflation at an increase of 1.29 percent per year.” Gotta love them econ majors.

Interestingly, USC students seemed to be in agreement about the average size of a male penis. Whereas UCLA respondents whose male and female answers were over an inch apart, USC were only off by half an inch: males said it was 7.5 inches and females said it’s 8 inches. This is quite impressive, considering a not-so-recent survey claimed L.A. ranked 17th in terms of penis size among 20 other U.S. cities.

They didn’t agree on masturbation, though — female USC students didn’t think it was obsessive to masturbate under 6.7 times per day. Males put the cap much lower at 4.5. The UCLA numbers were five and three respectively. Looks like the Trojans don’t just play well and more often with others — seems they play plenty alone.

Read the rest of the survey results at LA Weekly.