Vajacial, Vajazzling, Vattoo… STOP

We here at Sex and the 405 think it’s excellent that women are taking an interest in their bodies. We thought the vajacial (a “facial” to soothe the general area after a wax) was fine despite the bizarre explosion of hype and obvious misnomer (the vagina is inside. The outside is the vulva, got it?).

Then came the vajazzling craze, which involves adorning the vulva with Swarovski crystals. We watched tentatively as more and more people went nuts around the web, and tried not to break into hives when they talked about putting jewels “on the vagina.” We’re all about diamond-encrusted, platinum toys, but bedecking our vulvae in Swarovski? We thought the obsession with “vagina” decoration would die down as people experimented with the impracticality of it. We were wrong.

Now we find ourselves amidst the vattoo craze. Or twatto. Or whatever you want to call it. The spraying of images on the vulva.

Here are our thoughts: first of all, quit calling it a vagina. It’s a freaking vulva. If you’re going to obsess about your body parts, then at least have the decency to get the name right. Secondly, leave your vulva alone before it falls off. Seriously, this is getting ridiculous.