What A Porn Star Wants for Christmas: April O’Neil

Yesterday we took a peek a Zoe Voss’ Christmas wishlist to give you an idea of what a gorgeous woman in the adult business wants to fill her stocking. But since you can’t really generalize about an industry by one of its members, we’ve decided to bring you more.

Today’s wishlist belongs to model and performer April O’Neil, soon to play Deanna Troi on the TNG Star Trek porn parody. That’s not just a part for O’Neil, who’s actually quite a Trekkie. Don’t believe us? Get a load of her wishlist on Amazon. It seriously doesn’t get any geekier than this:

We don’t even know where to start there’s so much win here. We’re seriously planning on stealing that bloody bath mat for the zombie lovers in our respective universes. Now that’s just sheer genius.

We just have one question: what’s with porn stars and Dyson vacuum cleaners? Two doesn’t make a trend, but it is interesting that both the wishlists we’d pick to feature would include one — and not even the same model. Maybe there’s some interesting sex fetish thing we’re missing. Or maybe they’re the only vacuums that can handle the copious puddles of cum?

We promise to investigate.