Vehicular sex is the new black. Chasing the trend, Cosmopolitan magazine released a guide filled with tips to enable everyone to enjoy a little fun, fearless vehicular sex. Unfortunately, the author of the guide and her source seem to only have a passing knowledge of how cars work, beginning with the fact that seat belts aren’t useful restraints except for the most imaginative of role-players.

Carin Bondar, the scientist who brought us the web series Wild Sex — about the weird and kinky sex rituals in the animal kingdom — is working on a new show about the wondrous place where sex and biology collide. Called Sex Bytes, this new offering features fast, quirky little weekly videos centered on a specific topic, drawing on scientific literature.

Though pop psych would have us believe that all men would love to have a woman jump all over him saying she wants his cock right now, this isn’t always the case. The moment the person approaching lets go of generalizations (whether they are related to gender, race, age, etc.), that’s the moment the approach becomes “dignified.” Dignity, after all, is not about how you dress or how you speak, but rather that you see other people as human beings — individual human beings who have their own opinions, ideas, and desires (which may or may not include you in a sexual or even platonic sense).

Not all of us attended a progressive school that felt knowing our genitals was a logical part of learning about the human body. While we can figure out how these aspects of ourselves work with some experimentation, there are some things the school of hard knocks isn’t so ready to impart. To this end, here’s your guide to the proper names of our genderbits and, perhaps most importantly, their plurals.

Afraid your spouse might cheat? Boy, have we got a solution for you! The Cheeky has crafted an anti-cheating wedding band that will completely foil their plans to step out on you! How does it work? Glad you asked! The $550 dollar titanium ring (take that DeBeers!) is negatively engraved on the inside with the words I’M MARRIED, so even if your cheating louse of a spouse takes the ring off, everyone can still tell that he or she is off the market. Fidelity assured!

Let’s talk about the strippers. Whether they like to be half-naked or not, whether they enjoy turning you on or not, there’s one thing they all have in common: they’re working. Whether you think that taking one’s clothes off for money is a great choice of career is really beside the point (is it a possibility for you to make $500 per hour at your job without a law degree? Just asking). These women are providing fantasy, yes, but that is their job. And as a patron of the establishment where they work, you need to treat them like you would anyone else who provides a service to you.

It’s summer. Hot days and hot nights. And they’re about to get a lot hotter. Our editrix got back from a party in New York celebrating the launch of two new Durex products designed specifically to get couples synced up in the sack. It’s the holy grail of sexual relationships. Anyway, as soon as she walked in the door, we did what we always do: jumped all over her luggage looking for swag. This is what we found and here’s how you can get it (free, of course. You’re welcome).

The Oatmeal has whipped up a selection of cards for that sweet troll in your life. Five bucks gets you one complete with an envelope — with special deals for those who like to plan ahead (or those who know it’s not a bad idea to put the eggs in various baskets?). These are our favorite cards.

Valentine’s Day can be stressful, if you or your significant other care about such trifles. Fear not — UrbanDaddy has scored a major win for you. Anytime within the next fifteen days, you can purchase a two-night stay at the boutique Palihotel on Melrose for $400. The room alone would otherwise run you around $550…continue reading.

Some years ago in London, the adult entertainment star Sabrina Deep had a revolutionary idea: to allow fans to experience what they saw in her films. A few days later, for her twenty-ninth birthday, she threw a party during which she had sex with 77 men for eight hours straight. To date that is the longest and most populated gang bang to grace the internet (she livecast it, of course!). Today, she’ll teach us what we need to know in the event we’d like to hold our own gang bang.