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We reached out to people in both the tech and adult industries to see what the options look like for the creators of adult content who will be displaced by Blogger’s ban on sexy and we have some good news. You’re not totally shit out of luck. It’s time to pack it up, and we’ve got some options lined up for you.

The adult media empire WoodRocket has dedicated the most recent episode of its “Ask A Pornstar” webseries to live readings of performers’ hate mail. The six-minute episode contains no nudity, but is completely unsafe for work due to language. It is not fun to watch. But that doesn’t mean it’s not important.

The country that brought you Georges Bataille, Pauline Réage, Charles Baudelaire, the Marquis de Sade, Catherine Millet, etc., doesn’t see what the fuss is over Fifty Shades of Grey. The film, which got an R rating from the Motion Pictures Association of America for its depiction of dominance and submission, will be accessible to movie-going French minors as young as twelve.

In the modern rendering of the alpha male, the promise of access to territories, resources and protection for mating females is largely nonexistent — as is any notion of parental care investment. In this sense, the social aspects of “alpha” become conflated with those of dominance among species where females require only one thing from the male: his DNA.

We live in a world where some stigmatized groups have finally achieved a rightful place in the streets where they can congregate and bring their grievances to the state. But just as they have attained this, they’re finding that new, much more effective avenues to change are being denied to them by powers that aren’t under any obligation to the public.

Today, Google announced infinite gender options for users on the social network Google Plus, a move that tops Facebook’s February announcement of 56 additional options on its gender menu. After selecting the Custom option for gender, users will be prompted to enter their preferred gender into a freeform field. A user can write anything they like there, including emojis.

“Pino is the first pleasure object ever created to satisfy the hedonistic sexual cravings and excesses exhibited by members of the financial world,” reads copy written by people still trapped in the 80s, somewhere between 9 1/2 Weeks and The Bonfire of the Vanities. The government bailouts, the foreclosure crisis, the resulting Occupy movement — none of these things exist in their suspended reality.

As a person inhabiting this world, it is your ethical responsibility to take the time to decide how to best work toward something better. Whether you’re donating $50, $50,000, or only able to use Smile or affiliate links to help out, it counts, and it’s worth it. Not for the “feels,” but for tomorrow.

The California Highway Patrol has a fun little incentive to arrest you: the desire to see you naked. A CHP officer told investigators that officers have been stealing and sharing explicit photos of female suspects for years as part of a “game.” Presumably, the game involves finding the raciest possible images on a suspect’s phone and sharing them with other officers and non-CHP individuals for commentary and approval.

Tritium that gets into the body is able to release beta particles, which are prone to altering our cells in nasty ways, resulting in cancer, mutation and death. But there is a way to reduce exposure: basically, feel free to begin calling your drunken hookups your “decontamination protocol.”